Replaying UEFA Euro 2008
I decided to go back into the video game time machine for the first time since our archival dig of Tecmo Super Bowl. UEFA Euro 2008 for the XBOX 360 is a good looking game for its early generation release. The player models are impressive, the game has a decent amount of options, and the quality of play is, well...
Oh my God what happened to Thierry Henry's face? Why does his mouth open like a nutcracker? Ahhhhh it's horrible. The graphics looked fine until then...
Sorry, that was a bit unsettling. The gameplay is touching the peak of non-360 movement quality. It's not true soccer. But then again, who's looking to play forty-five minute halves? If gamers want realistic sports they should probably get off their sofas. EA's has always made it tough to gauge the proper difficulty setting on their soccer games. UEFA 2008 has the same issue. At the medium setting it can be tough for an inexperienced player to advance past the pressuring defenders. Turn the setting down one notch and the backline becomes statuesque as you move the ball towards an inevitable goal.
Oh my god it happened again! Why does his chin melt so unnaturally? His celebrations are like horror films. How could EA create Thierry Henry's likeness with such an uncaring attitude toward the viewer? Kids will wet their beds. This is unhealthy.
Wow, that just keeps happening. Anyway, my co-author, Killer, would be greatly upset to learn I was playing a soccer game as Ireland's arch rival France. But there was an achievement involved and frankly, their offense is just better than most teams'. Besides how well is Ireland really going to do at Euro 2012? I imagine our debate over that question would go like this:
Killer- I think Ireland has a chance to win the Euro.
Me- Ha. Oh my god what is wrong with Thierry Henry's face?
Killer- What?
Me- Seriously it's happening again, he's entered our joke segments.
Really, should I be up 3-0 on Italy? In the first half? This is the EA difficulty setting conundrum. Regardless, the loaded French national team from the Euro 2008 game is like a time capsule. It's pretty astounding that this squad would end up finishing last in their group. Still, it's funny how many stars from the 2010 World Cup aren't even representing their countries from two years prior: Thomas Muller, Mesut Ozil, Hugo Lloris. Yet there are legends hanging around like Raul, Claude Makelele, and Jens Lehmann who won't be found on their national teams by FIFA World Cup 2010.
A similar example could be found in Madden 2001. There was a significant void at the quarterback position. Elway, Marino, Aikman, and Young had recently retired. Roethlisberger, Rivers, Brees and Rodgers hadn't entered the league. Brady was a sixth round draft pick riding the bench, while McNabb and Manning were trying to improve on their mediocre rookie seasons. With the likes of Elvis Grbac and Rich Gannon populating passing stat leader boards, it's no surprise that in the following three seasons Trent Dilfer and Brad Johnson would claim Super Bowl championships.
Ahhhh that's horrible. Why won't they just make better animations? Every goal is like the end of "Raiders of the Lost Ark".
Maybe this was a bad idea. Perhaps there should be a statute of limitations on playing outdated video games. Improved graphics are important. Plus I mean there's no way that some of these players are coming back to European relevance.
What's that? Arsenal signed Thierry Henry on a two-month loan?
It's happening, again...
Oh my God what happened to Thierry Henry's face? Why does his mouth open like a nutcracker? Ahhhhh it's horrible. The graphics looked fine until then...
Sorry, that was a bit unsettling. The gameplay is touching the peak of non-360 movement quality. It's not true soccer. But then again, who's looking to play forty-five minute halves? If gamers want realistic sports they should probably get off their sofas. EA's has always made it tough to gauge the proper difficulty setting on their soccer games. UEFA 2008 has the same issue. At the medium setting it can be tough for an inexperienced player to advance past the pressuring defenders. Turn the setting down one notch and the backline becomes statuesque as you move the ball towards an inevitable goal.
Oh my god it happened again! Why does his chin melt so unnaturally? His celebrations are like horror films. How could EA create Thierry Henry's likeness with such an uncaring attitude toward the viewer? Kids will wet their beds. This is unhealthy.
Wow, that just keeps happening. Anyway, my co-author, Killer, would be greatly upset to learn I was playing a soccer game as Ireland's arch rival France. But there was an achievement involved and frankly, their offense is just better than most teams'. Besides how well is Ireland really going to do at Euro 2012? I imagine our debate over that question would go like this:
Killer- I think Ireland has a chance to win the Euro.
Me- Ha. Oh my god what is wrong with Thierry Henry's face?
Killer- What?
Me- Seriously it's happening again, he's entered our joke segments.
Really, should I be up 3-0 on Italy? In the first half? This is the EA difficulty setting conundrum. Regardless, the loaded French national team from the Euro 2008 game is like a time capsule. It's pretty astounding that this squad would end up finishing last in their group. Still, it's funny how many stars from the 2010 World Cup aren't even representing their countries from two years prior: Thomas Muller, Mesut Ozil, Hugo Lloris. Yet there are legends hanging around like Raul, Claude Makelele, and Jens Lehmann who won't be found on their national teams by FIFA World Cup 2010.
A similar example could be found in Madden 2001. There was a significant void at the quarterback position. Elway, Marino, Aikman, and Young had recently retired. Roethlisberger, Rivers, Brees and Rodgers hadn't entered the league. Brady was a sixth round draft pick riding the bench, while McNabb and Manning were trying to improve on their mediocre rookie seasons. With the likes of Elvis Grbac and Rich Gannon populating passing stat leader boards, it's no surprise that in the following three seasons Trent Dilfer and Brad Johnson would claim Super Bowl championships.
Ahhhh that's horrible. Why won't they just make better animations? Every goal is like the end of "Raiders of the Lost Ark".
Maybe this was a bad idea. Perhaps there should be a statute of limitations on playing outdated video games. Improved graphics are important. Plus I mean there's no way that some of these players are coming back to European relevance.
What's that? Arsenal signed Thierry Henry on a two-month loan?
It's happening, again...
Posted by W.H. Patton at Friday, December 30. 2011 
Categories: Tales from Sporty's World, Diary of a Futbol Junkie, Button Pressing
Categories: Tales from Sporty's World, Diary of a Futbol Junkie, Button Pressing
Comments